My Blog in 2014

Well, I've learned that I shouldn't drink and blog. I'll keep that in mind for the future.

“Relationships don’t work they way they do on television and in the movies. Will they? Won’t they? And then they finally do, and they’re happy forever. Gimme a break.

Nine out of ten of them end because they weren’t right for each other to begin with, and half of the ones who get married get divorced anyway, and I’m telling you right now, through all this stuff I have not become a cynic. I haven’t.

Yes, I do happen to believe that love is mainly about pushing chocolate covered candies and, y’know, in some cultures, a chicken.

You can call me a sucker, I don’t care, because I do believe in it. Bottom line: it’s couples who are truly right for each other wade through the same crap as everybody else, but the big difference is they don’t let it take them down.

One of those two people will stand up and fight for that relationship every time. If it’s right, and they’re real lucky, one of them will say something.”

“I’ve been thinking a lot lately about taking chances, and how it’s really just about overcoming your fears. Because the truth is, everytime you take a big risk in your life, no matter how it ends up, you’re always glad you took it. “

“All right, fine, Elliot. You wanna know why? You're just like me. You're scared because you feel like you haven't accomplished anything with your life. But instead of running a triathlon, you're pushing forward with a guy you don't belong with. And you know as well as I do, one of these days he's gonna open up a bottle of white wine for you when you really prefer red, except you never told him that; and you wanna know why? It's because he's not right for you, Elliot. Are you happy now?“

“I think one of the most universal human experiences is feeling alone. You’d never know it, but there’s most likely tons of people feeling the exact same way. Maybe because you’re feeling abandoned. Maybe because you realize that you aren’t as self-sufficient as you thought. Maybe because you know you should’ve handled something differently. Or maybe because you aren’t as good as you thought you were. Either way, when you hit that low point, you have a choice. You can either wallow in self-pity…Or you can suck it up. It’s your call.”

I love that I'm 22 years old, and I still live my life through lessons I learned watching Scrubs. I don't think I'll ever grow out of that show haha, but then I'd never want to.

There are always so many things changing in my life all the time. Chaos is 80% of my every day life, and I like leaving things up to circumstance and chance, but where has that gotten me lately?

I feel like this spring, I'm exactly where I was last Spring, and I'm not okay with that.

I like all my classes, that isn't the issue. I just find myself in another ACMO musical, working at Mac Grill, and seeing the same faces day in and day out.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining about these things. I love my cast and show. I love my job and work friends, and I don't know where I'd be without my friends, but I need something else.
I feel like Belle in the beginning of Beauty and the Beast, wanting adventure in the great wide somewhere. I want to go on a roadtrip with two friends and just be alive in the world with no cares one more time before I'm forced to grow up, graduate, and begin the long process of becoming an adult.

Ive never wanted to grow up. If there were a Neverland, I'd be there in a heart beat, but lately it's becoming more apparent that I'm going to have to soon. Pretty soon everyone from my freshman group of friends will have Graduated, and I'll still be here. I don't like telling people that I failed a year of college. Then I have to get into the explanations of everything, and they just look at me with that face full of pity, and they don't know what to say.

Should I have gotten help when I needed it? Yes. Was in the right state if mind to know that? No.

That's in the past though. I've moved on since then, and have been doing better and better in my classes every semester. It's still hard. The motivation isn't there like it used to be, but Im sure it'll be back once it comes down to Crunch Time.


My opinions are ever changing. Especially so when it comes to love. I think my problem has always been that I try to hard to understand it and how it works, when really we can't. We can't determine what Love even really is, just that we feel it and it can be powerful. Anytime I ask someone their definition of love, it's a different answer. For awhile, I thought I had it all figured out, and who knows.. maybe I did at one point, but life throws too many curve balls, and one decision impacts another. Things, opinions, and people change. I just know that I've got a lot of reflecting to do in the future.

As for now, I'm ready to change things up. Here's to more blogs in the future once I start figuring things out again. =]